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Lions Roar : March 2006
www.tíbethouse.org · www.menla.org Metta Prayer Mayall beings be peaceful. Mayall beings be happy. Mayall beings by safe. Mayall beings awaken to the light of their true nature. Mayall beings be free. only at DharmaCrafts The never-ending Metta Prayer entwines this finely engraved mobius bracelet. 8 3/4" around Sterling silver #J084 $69 14kgold #J084G $1199 The Catalog of Meditation Supplies 800.794.9862 www.dharmacrafts.com Free gift! Order online using keycode 55MB 24 SHAMBHALA SUN MARCH 2006 riding mysterious waves of passion, ag- gression, and ignorance (and boredom), I think we began to live within love itself. At least I did. Each time I have opened up, extended myself, accepted what was being offered to me, stepped beyond my comfort zone to embrace him, the structure has been reinforced. I no longer have any idea if I love my husband or not. I can't imag- ine what the feelings I have for him could be called. I've even given up trying to love him. Our relationship is what gives us love, not the other way around. This is how it is. And finally we're saying "I do" to good- bye. This bond will end. Hello can only mean goodbye, one way or another. Some relationships are just mistakes. Or people grow and change. Relationships crater and nobody knows why. And if all else fails, we will certainly part at death. Saul Bellow once called this acknowledgment "the black backing on the mirror that allows us to see anything at all;' and isn't that just the key to the whole thing? The deeper our con- nection becomes, the more I know the real- ity of its ending and the more passionately I'm able to feel his touch. I know this even when I hate him (and he can really be an asshole-I'm not kidding) and when I love him so much that I plead for the opportu- nity to be married for all our lifetimes. Each time my love expands by a mol- ecule, it grows a molecule of sorrow. The more I love, the edgier it all feels, and the more courage is required. Where you get this courage, I really don't know. Sur- prisingly, it just seems to be there. And if you're looking for a crucible in which to heat compassion, this is a really good one. Someone once told me that compassion is the ability to hold love and pain together in the same moment. So at least we're learning something, which is what I tell myself. It sort of helps, but not really. Here's something else I've learned about a relationship: Okay, so it's not what you think it's going to be, the feelings are always changing, and you're going to have to say goodbye someday. But when you find your true love, there is something inside that simply and inexplicably says hello to him. Yes to him. Of course to him. Certainly. Obviously it's you. There is no choice. I do..