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Lions Roar : January 2012
SHAMBHALA SUN JANUARY 2012 88 Thursday. (FYI, he stood me up.) Not to be too Oprah about it, but cultivating the habit of being positive is contagious. The ongoing struggle in my mind regard- ing the failure of my marriage is not that it ended—but that it did not end on my terms. I am quite happy to have my freedom once again: I’m not at all opposed to living alone, doing my own laundry, eating takeout 24/7, or dating online. For it all to have come to a crashing end with the discovery of an affair is the unpleasant part. Of all the people who rang in on my union’s demise, the best guidance, sur- prisingly, came from a man who does his damnedest to keep people together. “You’re a young guy. You have your whole life ahead of you,” Gottman advised. “Do you really want to be with someone who hurts you like that when you’re older?” Turns out, the woman I waited forty- one years to marry just wasn’t the right girl for me. Separate out all the unpleasant- ness, and you’ve still got two people who loved one another for a spell and couldn’t find a way to work things out. News Flash: Successful, long-term, committed rela- tionships are a difficult proposal. It wasn’t that we didn’t have solid role models to observe: my folks have been married for fifty-six years, and hers almost forty. Dur- ing those decades, issues arose, times got tough. But they worked through it. They made the effort. They put in the time and stayed dedicated. Not us. On the last day of my Speak No Evil experiment, with Tulku’s mantras echo- ing in my head, I got online with new intentions. I set my browser to open to Gimundo.com (“Good News... Served Daily”). I visited the neighborhood blog for traffic and local burglary updates, then Facebook to see if anyone had “poked” me. (What the hell does that mean?) Stifling the urge to ridicule several friends, I man- aged to “Like” three of four posts, includ- ing one from an acquaintance who suc- cessfully ran a marathon over the weekend, and (yet another) photo of a friend’s dog— this time in old-fashioned sepia tone! “He’s a GOOD BOY!” I commented. “And is that a new collar? So handsome!” My fellow scribe A.J. Jacobs posted a