using the arrow buttons.
by clicking on the page.
the page around when zoomed in by dragging it.
the zoom using the slider when zoomed-in.
by clicking on the zoomed-in page.
by entering text in the search field, and select "This Issue" or "All Issues"
by clicking on thumbnails to select pages, and then press the print button.
displays sections with thumbnails and descriptions.
displays a slider of thumbnails. Click on a page to jump.
allows you to browse the full archive.
about your subscription?
Lions Roar : July 2015
I put a bunch of rope in the trunk of my car and drove out to the Gorge Metro Park, just down the street from where I lived. My plan was to carry that rope out as far away from people as I could, find a sturdy tree, and do the deed. But when I stepped out of my car I saw some kids playing in the field right near the parking lot. I realized I could never find a spot far enough off the path where there wasn’t some chance a little kid out for a hike, or a young couple look- ing for a make-out spot, or an old man with a picnic basket and a picture of his late wife, might find me. Then I thought about my mom and how bummed out she’d be if I killed myself. And I thought about Iggy, a friend who’d killed himself about ten years earlier, and how I was still not over that. I put the rope back in the trunk and went home. That day changed me forever. I decided to live. But I also decided I was no longer bound to anything that came before that day. I decided that conceptu- ally I had killed myself. Now I could do anything—absolutely anything at all. All the greatest things that have hap- pened to me in my life have happened since that day. Things have been so incredible since then that I sometimes wonder if I’m the main character in some weird existentialist movie and that there’ll be a twist ending in which the audience will realize that I really did kill myself that day. If you’re contemplating suicide, my advice is, go ahead and kill yourself. But don’tdoitwitharopeoragunora knife or a handful of pills. Don’t do it by destroying your body. Do it by cutting off your former life and going in a com- pletely new direction. I know that’s not easy. I know it might even seem impos- sible. If you’d have asked me before that spring day in 1992, I would have told you it was absolutely impossible for me to do any of the things I’ve done since that day. It took a lot of very hard effort before things started to change even a little bit. But when they did, they really did. Maybe that’s not where you’re at, though. Maybe you’re just stuck there trying to figure out how to respond to the news that someone you cared about decided to end her own life. Maybe you just want an explanation. Maybe you just want things to be like they were before. Maybe you wish you’d done something different, said something different, been somewhere where you could have prevented it. You’re not alone. Everyone who has ever known someone who killed themselves had the same questions and sec- ond-guessed themselves the same way. But know that those are just thoughts. They don’t necessarily mean much. The human brain likes to organize things. It tries its best to make sense of whatever it encounters. But some things just don’t make sense. We don’t like that. But it’s the truth. It’s hard to let go of these kinds of thoughts. But it’s the only way to deal with them. They don’t lead anywhere. They don’t help. Letting go is easier said than done. If you find that you can’t let go even though you want to, then just let go of letting go. Accept the fact that you can’t let go as it is and do something else anyway. Whatever you do is probably fine. See a movie, take a walk, watch the ducks, go to work. Decide to live, and you can do anything—absolutely any- thing at all. ♦ If you’d have asked me before that spring day in 1992, I would have told you it was absolutely impossible for me to do any of the things I’ve done since that day. NORTH POINT PRESS A division of Farrar, Straus and Giroux www.fsgbooks.com/theroadhome “A beautiful guide and invitation to a sane life. Refreshingly straight- forward, accessible, skillful, and kind.” —Jack Kornfield, author of The Wise Heart A Photographic Pilgrimage of Ongoing Spirituality by award-winning author Simhananda “ Tis photographic pilgrimage of ongoing spirituality is an homage to marvelous Tibet. ” Tis book is a photographic pilgrimage of Tibet, and a powerful guide for meditation, refection and comprehension for the diferent stages of our evolution. Blessings from the Land of the Snows Tibet! Emaho www.PalmPublications.com 978-1-928016-00-7 – Foreword Reviews Shambala add 5.indd 1 2014-12-17 14:43 SHAMBHALA SUN JULY 2015 28 CULTURE • LIFE • PRACTICE